For If You’ve Ever Been Cheated On

Hey Readers,

I want to get serious for one moment. (Which I know is unusual for a stand up comedian but hey, in between all those gigs around New York, Los Angeles, and Lousiana, you have to find the time for a moment of seriousness every now and then!)

No one wants to get cheated on. We all get into relationships looking for fun, comfortable companionship, romance, and basically the happy-ever-after – not to get our egos stepped on and our faces shamed in a society that celebrates the guts of the cheater for being ‘cool’.

The worst and most difficult part of being cheated on, more than the pain of the betrayal, is moving on from the self-degrading thoughts about it. According to the guide on asking a girl out, the spark of the chase dies once you get the girl. In any cases of cheating, the ego-factor of being cheated on is the hardest thing about the whole situation. We can hardly stop ourselves from getting all the blame – that maybe we’re not good enough, that maybe we deserved such unkindness from someone who we thought loved us as much as we loved them.

I believe this is so much harder for men and their egos. Cheating– not funny.

So here’s something for the poor gentlemen out there who have had their taste of being cheated on by their dearly beloved girlfriends.

Here are some tips on what to do when you’ve been cheated on.

Okay so, revenge is not an option to begin with. It’s bad and useless. You take revenge, gamble on your feelings again, harbor in some sleepless nights over so much anger, maybe get what you want and then what? At the end of it all, what’s it worth? Would you feel better, would you sleep better at night, knowing that you’ve answered one bad deed with another evil deed? No. Don’t waste your time, energy and effort planning and carrying out your ultimate revenge for what she’s done to you. Believe me, it’s not worth it. Instead, focus yourself on positive and productive things – things that could make you become someone she’d regret cheating on. Start with working on getting rich.

Remember also that you did not deserve it and you are a great person. It’s normal to question your self-worth when someone plays around with your feelings. It’s easy to doubt your self-worth when someone obviously did not see it. But remember this: you are worth something. You know your worth, you know what you’re good at, and you know what that girl is missing. You’re awesome and someone is watching you from afar wishing for you to notice her.

Scream and then focus on doing productive things. Become better in school or at work. Throw a party. Yes– parties can be really productive– it helps your bruised ego get back into the game. Change your wardrobe, change your hairstyle, and most important of all – change your perspective. She did not deserve you in the first place, so don’t try to change yourself to make her want you. Change yourself because you want to change your life – you want to transform it into something that your next lover will be proud of.

And whatever you do, don’t fall into a rebound relationship. You don’t need to show people that you’ve moved on when you clearly have not. You would be unfair to your rebound girl and to yourself. And more likely than not, your cheating ex would be laughing herself silly because she’d see right through you that you were so desperate about her you went all time low with a rebound.

Being cheated on is horrible but it is not and should not be the end of the world for you and your love life. Good luck and sign up here to attend my upcoming standup comedy show:!